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• (772): View more from Florida

  you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.

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• (909): View more from California

  He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.

  (1-506): View more from New Brunswick

  Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW

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• (949): View more from California

  also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"

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• (631): View more from New York

  So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family

  (1-631): View more from New York

  I'm a family man but I have priorities

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!

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