Texts From Last Night

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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people

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  (317): I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people http://tfl.nu/qth2
  Replies (34) Good night (6778) Bad night (1003)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Banned from zoo.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Again?

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  (240): Banned from zoo. (301): Again? http://tfl.nu/bv0w
  Replies (44) Good night (17399) Bad night (1271)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.

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  (318): I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky. http://tfl.nu/cr7y
  Replies (36) Good night (3935) Bad night (1008)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I want you more than these girls want KFC

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  (604): I want you more than these girls want KFC http://tfl.nu/a34i
  Replies (37) Good night (3797) Bad night (912)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.

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  (978): So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease. http://tfl.nu/08pd
  Replies (18) Good night (1073) Bad night (6194)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.

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  (352): He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number. http://tfl.nu/0dku
  Replies (7) Good night (897) Bad night (4469)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.

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  (715): I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to. http://tfl.nu/bxlt
  Replies (8) Good night (960) Bad night (3892)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata

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  (719): im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata http://tfl.nu/j3vj
  Replies (8) Good night (3395) Bad night (814)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.

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  (484): Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that. http://tfl.nu/p43x
  Replies (6) Good night (657) Bad night (2166)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.

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  (843): Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex. http://tfl.nu/rb17
  Replies (11) Good night (560) Bad night (1866)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.

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  (520): This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings. http://tfl.nu/9nj8
  Replies (6) Good night (1841) Bad night (530)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.

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  (732): I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves. http://tfl.nu/qhy3
  Replies (3) Good night (656) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Why is there puke in my guitar?

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Because you puked in your guitar.

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  (203): Why is there puke in my guitar? (860): Because you puked in your guitar. http://tfl.nu/mgzl
  Replies (2) Good night (477) Bad night (766)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere

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  (253): First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere http://tfl.nu/66bl
  Replies (0) Good night (644) Bad night (332)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack

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  (920): I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack http://tfl.nu/hqr0
  Replies (2) Good night (810) Bad night (278)

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