Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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