i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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