All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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