Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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