I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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