I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.