So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
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I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba