It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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