Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Nicole vs. Life
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
