Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
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