the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
