My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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