butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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