Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
