forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
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He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
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i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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