I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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