i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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