he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people