Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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