On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
