I'm really into asian looking animals
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Even my vagina gasped.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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