I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I just googled if crying burns calories
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
