im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.