this just has baby written all over it
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
pray to the hookup gods
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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