Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
