mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
