i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
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