Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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