FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Randomize
