Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
