so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
