my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Randomize
