i used baking grease as lip gloss
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
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