Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I licked your asshole in confidence.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
