Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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