My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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