About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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