all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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