Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
