you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Every concussion has its silver lining
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize