Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
