her vagine was all disorganized.
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
