i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize