I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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