somebody snuck up and got me drunk
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
