Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  How is your vagina???

  (941): View more from Florida

  Double booked

  (646): View more from New York

  With your butt?

  (941): View more from Florida

  Totes, candlesticks and all

  (646): View more from New York

  Yay!!

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  (646): How is your vagina??? (941): Double booked (646): With your butt? (941): Totes, candlesticks and all (646): Yay!! http://tfl.nu/9v3z
  Replies (4) Good night (1902) Bad night (711)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?

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  (320): If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say? http://tfl.nu/bcus
  Replies (32) Good night (1644) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus

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  (540): I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus http://tfl.nu/qqxc
  Replies (37) Good night (1210) Bad night (4067)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me

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  (801): so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me http://tfl.nu/is24
  Replies (81) Good night (8564) Bad night (971)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.

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  (202): Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death. http://tfl.nu/mvsk
  Replies (12) Good night (1012) Bad night (4936)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is

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  (662): I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is http://tfl.nu/ce5u
  Replies (16) Good night (5147) Bad night (1794)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.

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  (860): Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise. http://tfl.nu/z4y1
  Replies (9) Good night (670) Bad night (3949)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up

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  (720): I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up http://tfl.nu/nnr4
  Replies (5) Good night (3511) Bad night (876)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.

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  (609): He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place. http://tfl.nu/k1hb
  Replies (30) Good night (1317) Bad night (1942)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN

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  (715): just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN http://tfl.nu/9tva
  Replies (24) Good night (2022) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (819): View more from Quebec

  I have grass duct taped all over my body

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  (819): I have grass duct taped all over my body http://tfl.nu/3nqm
  Replies (2) Good night (848) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.

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  (402): Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains. http://tfl.nu/xruv
  Replies (8) Good night (1312) Bad night (421)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over

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  (515): Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over http://tfl.nu/s97w
  Replies (2) Good night (528) Bad night (361)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up

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  (914): Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up http://tfl.nu/yx6y
  Replies (4) Good night (856) Bad night (230)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia

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  (704): I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia http://tfl.nu/1d6y
  Replies (2) Good night (174) Bad night (438)

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