...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.