Texts From Last Night

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  (574): View more from Indiana

  Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.

  (260): View more from Indiana

  At least you didn't call me Brittany this time

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  (574): Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa. (260): At least you didn't call me Brittany this time http://tfl.nu/6s1p
  Replies (6) Good night (764) Bad night (1410)
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  (661): View more from California

  Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,

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  (661): Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi, http://tfl.nu/04ch
  Replies (35) Good night (1422) Bad night (2132)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.

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  (303): Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper. http://tfl.nu/rq4b
  Replies (68) Good night (8931) Bad night (749)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Since when is my name a synonym for head?

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  (908): Since when is my name a synonym for head? http://tfl.nu/s1ks
  Replies (40) Good night (3568) Bad night (1374)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.

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  (732): I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something. http://tfl.nu/rxn8
  Replies (22) Good night (4113) Bad night (1491)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.

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  (816): I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ. http://tfl.nu/y7u3
  Replies (16) Good night (4139) Bad night (723)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.

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  (248): He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me. http://tfl.nu/d9on
  Replies (18) Good night (4579) Bad night (1155)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.

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  (203): Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast. http://tfl.nu/5wgc
  Replies (45) Good night (7501) Bad night (1005)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.

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  (205): You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you. http://tfl.nu/htvc
  Replies (3) Good night (2201) Bad night (722)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I will miss his soup and his dick the most

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  (561): I will miss his soup and his dick the most http://tfl.nu/ampu
  Replies (7) Good night (1619) Bad night (1084)
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  (779): View more from Illinois

  We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..

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  (779): We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time.. http://tfl.nu/hdfa
  Replies (2) Good night (2183) Bad night (868)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after

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  (505): Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after http://tfl.nu/uja5
  Replies (2) Good night (1529) Bad night (853)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.

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  (508): Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess. http://tfl.nu/kvya
  Replies (7) Good night (1729) Bad night (505)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?

  (561): View more from Florida

  Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.

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  (954): Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do? (561): Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one. http://tfl.nu/ehu8
  Replies (4) Good night (830) Bad night (216)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.

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  (516): I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life. http://tfl.nu/l6bp
  Replies (0) Good night (462) Bad night (230)

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