The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
the day after is always just damage control
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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