We won't sleep together?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
