oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
