Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
