If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
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