I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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